If you were to plan your funeral, what songs would you choose? What scriptures? Who would you have speak at the service? What would they say about you in that setting? Most likely they would find nice things to say.
Suppose there was a gathering of folks who went to your funeral and they got together later that day. Away from the setting of enforced niceness, what truths would they tell about you?
One final question: What would others write on your tombstone? Here are some actual examples.

*In a Silver City, Nev., cemetery
Here lays Butch,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.

*In the East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia
Here lies Ezekial Aikle Age 102 The Good Die Young

*In a Waynesville, N.C., cemetery Effie Jean Robinson 1897-1922
Come blooming youths, as you pass by
And on these lines do cast an eye
As you are now, so once was I;
As I am now, so must you be;
Prepare for death and follow me.
To which someone had added some graffiti:
To follow you
I am not content
How do I know
Which way you went

* In a Thurmont, Md., cemetery
Here lies an Atheist. All dressed up, And no place to go

* In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery for Anna Wallace
The children of Israel wanted bread
And the Lord sent them manna,
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.

Those epitaphs tell one story about how some people were viewed. How do you want to be remembered? What words do you want others to put on your tombstone? What words would you choose to be your theme for the rest of your days? What words of wisdom and insight would you share with those you love?
My mother suffered a massive stroke on February 14th of this year, Valentine’s Day. When she regained consciousness she wrote this collection of sayings that had informed her life. Here are Mom’s words to live by:

*Brooding over the past paralyzes the present and bankrupts the future.

*Contentment comes not from great wealth, but fewer wants.

*Sin cannot be undone, only forgiven.

* A coincidence is an event in which God remains anonymous.

* There is a destiny that makes us brothers,
None goes his way alone.
All that we send into the lives of others,
Comes back into our own. -- Edwin Markham

*A promise made is a debt unpaid.

* Awareness is the beginning of understanding and true understanding is the beginning of justice.

Some of those sayings my brother and I heard thousands of times throughout our lives. Others I had never heard until mom showed me her list. Is there a refrigerator or a bulletin board at your home where you could post your favorite words of wisdom?

Another thing my mother used to tell me was a four word piece of advice. It simply said: “Remember who you are.”
My mother used to use that phrase when ever my brother and I were facing life transitions and decisions where she and dad would not be present. Going on my first debate trip? Remember who you are. Off to college? Remember who you are.

Who are you? Are you a mother or father? Then remember how loving and honorable mothers and fathers act. Are you a husband or wife? Then remember the vows you made on the day you were married. Are you a son or a daughter? Then remember to honor your parents and remember the words of wisdom they tried to impart to you over the years. Of course not all parents are worthy of honor. Some hurt and destroy their children’s lives. In that case work to heal the wounds and to forgive the scars. Are you a sibling? Then remember to act with forbearance and respect for the uniqueness of your brothers or sisters. Are you a friend? Then remember how friends act.

Most important of all, remember that you are a Child of God. Then remember to act in a way that will make God smile so God will say to the heavenly host with noticeable pride: “That’s my boy.” or “That’s my daughter.”
As long as we are talking about God and our relationship to God, I have discovered that sometimes the end product of following Jesus or being faithful to God is not that we are able to accomplish great things. More often it is about simply showing up, putting one foot in front of another, staying the course, doing the right thing even when it is difficult, and acting with integrity when others are not.

Another thing I have discovered is that very frequently, faith or trusting in God does not lead us to perform great good deeds that will make people sit up and take notice. Frequently, our faithfulness to the great and grand values of Christianity finds its most noble expression, not in the things we do, but in the things we avoid doing. Sometimes, the things we don’t do are phenomenal statements of the strength of our character and our understanding of God’s love.
Over the years as I have reflected on thought provoking sayings, as I have thought about my life, and the lives of others, I have come to a few awareness of my own. I do not consider myself a great philosopher or theologian, but I have discovered a few things that help me make sense of the events of my life.

Let me close with one last phrase; it is a phrase I think I made up. I’ve shared it with you a time or two before because it reminds me of the importance of taking the high road when I make decisions in life. Do I save face or act with integrity? Do I blame someone else or to take personal responsibility?

“The more often you take the easy road the more difficult life becomes. The more often you take the difficult road the easier life becomes.” Or to sum it up in 8 words: Easy choices hard life; hard choices fulfilling life.
Words of wisdom abound in our world. The bible is full of them. Seek out words that touch your heart and inspire your mind to be a better person; words that will motivate you to live nobly and with integrity, and that will make yourself proud, show the world who you are, and make God proud as well.

Over Their Dead Bodies by Thomas C. Mann and Janet Greene. Brattleboro, Vt., Stephen Greene Press, 1962. Grave Humor by Alonzo C. Hall. Charlotte, N.C., McNally of Charlotte, 1961. © 1975 - 1981 by David Wallechinsky & Irving Wallace Reproduced with permission from "The People's Almanac" series of books. All rights reserved.